officialunitedstates:

a shady stranger pulls me into a dark alley “hey kid do you want to do drugs” he says as he gives me a pencil and a form.  “I’m doing a survey for the census bureau”

3,254 notes

To prove a point to my mom, Reblog if you would go to comic con if you could.

tidilybidily0akdizzly:

i-am-dauntless-we-are-brave:

lumos5000:

image

THERE WOULD BE NO HESITATION. I WOULD GO THERE IN MY UNDERWEAR IF I HAD TO

IS THAT EVEN A REAL QUESTION OF COURSE

I CANT EVEN EXPLAIN WITH BOLD ITALIC CAPS LOCK HOW MUCH I WANT TO GO THERE 

(Source: madisonthedoctor)

332,271 notes

arise-chicken:

intellectualbadarse:

HOLY SHIT SIGNAL BOOST

OKAY OKAY OKAY so you know how certain men are SCARED of testicular cancer checks??? Having a stranger grab their balls? They could do this instead!!!

arise-chicken:

intellectualbadarse:

HOLY SHIT SIGNAL BOOST

OKAY OKAY OKAY so you know how certain men are SCARED of testicular cancer checks??? Having a stranger grab their balls? They could do this instead!!!

(Source: srsfunny)

291,862 notes

blue-eyed-hanji:

monobeartheater:

misses-sauce:

This is what anime sounds like to our parents

ITS THE THING

HEL P I CANT BRETAHE

(Source: neydimneoldum)

170,363 notes

shippingdara3008:

savannanicoleee:

decencybedamned:

So there’s this girl who was in my class this week. 8 years old, named Bella. Yesterday she was absent, and this was because she was visiting her father on set. Because her father is Mark Ruffalo.

image

Oh yes.

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I spent a week supervising Mark Ruffalo’s daughter and didn’t know until the last day of class.

image

image

Yes.

Imagine if mark Ruffalo saw this on tumblr…

What do you mean ‘imagine’? He probably already did

77,527 notes

fiona-so:

a-bitter-form-of-refuge:

angry-moth-noises:

freckledtrekkie:

teamfreekickass:

paging-doctorfaggot:

IS THAT WHY YOUR VOICE SOUNDS SO DIFFERENT ON THE PHONE

FUCK MY VOICE IS HIGHER THAN THIS

OH MY GOD

NO WONDER WHY I AM A SERRANO IN CHOIR

A serrano is a small green pepper. The word you are looking for is soprano.

fiona-so:

a-bitter-form-of-refuge:

angry-moth-noises:

freckledtrekkie:

teamfreekickass:

paging-doctorfaggot:

IS THAT WHY YOUR VOICE SOUNDS SO DIFFERENT ON THE PHONE

FUCK MY VOICE IS HIGHER THAN THIS

OH MY GOD

NO WONDER WHY I AM A SERRANO IN CHOIR

A serrano is a small green pepper. The word you are looking for is soprano.

(Source: ultrafacts)

296,126 notes

feferiden:

gingerhaze:

image

image

image

image

image

This is the realest shit

65,110 notes

twinpersonalitys:

ironychan:

redcaplf:

… Clockodiles? Is that pun very bad?

CLOCKODILES.

somewhere captain hook is shitting himself

twinpersonalitys:

ironychan:

redcaplf:

… Clockodiles? Is that pun very bad?

CLOCKODILES.

somewhere captain hook is shitting himself

226,747 notes